


Dangerous Fluids

by fuzipenguin



Series: Aliens and Earthlings [3]
Category: Transformers Generation One
Genre: F/M, Humor, Other, Xeno
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-20
Updated: 2016-01-20
Packaged: 2018-05-15 02:40:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5768221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuzipenguin/pseuds/fuzipenguin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Who can one go to to ask about safety of human-Cybertronian sex? Just your friendly, neighborhood CMO.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dangerous Fluids

**Author's Note:**

> Written for dracoqueen22's tumblr prompt for an extension of Close Encounters.

     “So, Ratchet…” Sideswipe began, sidling up next to the medic as he fiddled with something at his work bench. 

     Ratchet looked up at him through squinted optics, the downward turn of his lips indicating that Sideswipe had about twenty seconds to speak before tools started flying. 

     “Fraggin’  _what_?” Ratchet snapped.

     Damn. Ratchet was  _cranky_  today. Make that ten seconds. 

     Sideswipe had half a thought to turn tail and run away, spoiler between his legs, but then an image popped into his head. Mikaela, pink and dripping with sweat, arm buried up to her elbow in his valve. Her face upturned towards his, her expression challenging. 

     Now that he’d seen her that way, he couldn’t stop thinking about her. About what she would look like pink and dripping and open for his exploration. Expression desperate as he slid the pad of his thumb between her thighs. 

     He had been so close to seeing her face contort with pleasure that day in the Medical Bay. But Ironhide had chosen that moment to amble by, hollering for Sideswipe to join him on the range. There had been a scramble to right themselves and Mikaela had shooed him out despite Sideswipe’s reluctance.  

     He had caught her eyeing him speculatively ever since and he was sure he could convince her to give it another go. Somewhere private, where they wouldn’t be interrupted. But there was something else he needed to check on first. 

     So onwards and upwards and what was a new dent in the grand scheme of things?

     “Are any of our fluids are corrosive to a human? For example, if a ‘bot was self-servicing and maybe dripped a little lubricant onto the floor without knowing it and a human walked by later and slipped and fell into the lubricant and got some in their mouth, would that human be ok?” Sideswipe asked in a rush. And cringed, optics offlining in preparation for the blow. 

     When it didn’t come, Sideswipe tentatively onlined one optic and stared warily at Ratchet. The medic was gazing back at him, expression speculative. 

     “What?” Sideswipe questioned, not liking this deviation from the script at all. Ratchet was supposed to yell and wave his arms about and then impart medical wisdom while acting all reluctant about it. Not this… this _silence_.

     “Just this morning, Mikaela asked me what human fluids were harmful to a Cybertronian,” Ratchet replied thoughtfully. 

     “Oh? What an odd coincidence.” Sideswipe commented nonchalantly, taking a step back. If he could just reach the door…

     Ratchet’s hand whipped out and clamped down on Sideswipe’s wrist, halting his movement.

     Sideswipe absolutely did _not_ squeak in panic, no matter what Ratchet later said. 

     “Indeed. Where are you going, Sideswipe? We have so much to talk about…”

     Ratchet’ sudden grin was sharp enough to tear through the thickest armor.

 

~ End

 


End file.
